I read a story tonight on how to make the most of your sleep from ScienceCareers.org . In a nutshell, I'm screwed.
- Sleep only as much as you need to feel refreshed the next day. What if I don't have enough time to do that?
- Get up at the same time, 7 days a week. Oh crap.
- Exercise regularly. Do my bowels count?
- Make sure your bedroom is comfortable and free of disturbing light and noise. Whoo-hoo. I got one!
- Make sure that your bedroom is at a comfortable temperature during the night. Hey, it's pretty close.
- Eat regular meals and do not go to bed hungry. So eat at the same time? Crap.
- Avoid excessive fluids in the evening. Cut down on caffeine products. And I'm supposed to survive our crappy programming how?
- Avoid alcohol, especially in the evening. Hmm, that one's easy. I've got 3 points for me!
- Smoking may disturb sleep. No problem here either.
- Don't take your problems to bed. My problems are that I don't get enough sleep! Oh man…
- Train yourself to use the bedroom only for sleeping and sexual activity. Wait, I can do something else in my bedroom? Hmm
- Do not TRY to fall asleep. If you don't know you fall asleep, have you really fallen asleep?
- Put the clock under the bed or turn it so that you cannot see it. Clocks are for wussies. I use my phone.
- Avoid taking naps. I tried taking naps, but I don't know where to put them after I take them.
Well, I got 6 out of 14. I suppose that means that I'm only deprived of sleep 42.9% of the time.
“If you don’t know you fall asleep, have you really fallen asleep?”
The real question is, “If you know you’ve fallen asleep, have you really fallen asleep? And if you haven’t fallen asleep, how do you know?”
Wait…what?
Dude, you’re totally blowin’ my mind, man.